I want to say that I have a wonderful husband. He is so amazing.. he works so hard for me and I never thank him like I should. He had the day off yesterday and after church we went to Olive Garden for lunch, then he took me to Build-A-Bear. (I absolutely love that store!) I felt a little odd cuz there were mostly little girls building bears. I couldn't help listening in to all the conversations between the girls & their friends. They are so innocent and all they care about is which animal to take home. Oh to be that little again! I did build a bear.. actually a little bunny and dressed it and everything fun :) It was wonderful to spend a day just us, even though there are only two of us her all the time, it seems as if we are never together. I enjoyed every minute of it and can't wait to do it again!
Life seems to be going in so many directions that I never know which way is up. My emotions are all over the place and are very busy. I know before long it will be even more busy, but i am waiting for that time.
Its the middle of February and we are still waiting. We heard from our agency about 2 weeks ago and there were 2 moms that were having bi-racial boys. We told the agency we were very interested and told them to send our information to these moms. We have not heard anything from our adoption agency recently. I called the agency last week and left a message for someone to call me about, but of course I have not heard anything yet. I am very tired of waiting. I hate waiting. I know God is working in me and teaching me something, but I am unsure of what that is.
I have been enjoying life with my husband and being together just us. We do spend so much time together and were each others best friends. I am so ready to add a third human to our house. I am ready to wake up in the middle of the night, to change diapers, and so much more. I know all of this sounds crazy, but its true. I don't want to go through another mother's day with out being a mom.
I am feeling very lonely, I see all these moms with kids, new borns or those that are pregnate. I am trying to be happy for everyone and not let it get to me, but it has been. I know that Satan is using this to get to me because he knows he can get to me this way.
I am sorry, Lori. Please let me know if there is anything I can do. I'll be praying for you!
ReplyDeletebut who will sub for me when you have your baby?????
ReplyDeletehonestly, i do understand your longing for a baby. we didn't have to wait as long as you two, but i remember the same intense desire to do all things motherly.
i, too, have been praying for you.
for now, i'm grateful that you've been available to help in my classroom!
my heart goes out to you...i remember too how badly i ached to hold MY baby in my arms.
ReplyDelete*L* now sometimes i just can't wait to pass her off to someone else so i can give my aching arms a break. but i LOVE having her there all the same.
you are right to try to focus on enjoying your time together. those days may seem long and endless, but when they are gone it will seem they were short. being married to your best friend makes for the most rewarding parenting. :) your baby's mom will see that in you.
hang in there. your time is coming.
thanks for the encouragement! I appreciate it!
ReplyDeletejust know that we care for you very much and you are on the top of my prayer journal! we waited 6 years for our first child, some of them by choice, some not. i remember all my friends having babies and that aching feeling. i don't understand God's timing, but i know it's perfect. we will keep praying!
ReplyDeleteLori~ I don't know you, but my prayers are with you. We, too, have been married five years and just added to our family through adoption. Not brand new babies, but a two and three year old boy and girl. My arms will forever ache for that new baby, but God has it all worked out. Hang in there. It's not easy, but looks as if you have lots of support.
ReplyDeleteHis blessings on your day....
Jody Garber